[chapter:Maybe]

  “Allow me to offer our most sincere apology Mr. Sterling,if this caused you any inconveniences, however we are ....”

  “Yes yes, thanks anyways. I’m sure your company is doing your best.” - C. Sterling

  Hanging up out of frustration, I tossed my phone onto the front passenger seat of the car. “Yea..yea… I’m sure as hell they’re doing jack all about my missing bags. Well anyways, I’m beyond fucked at this point.” I muttered to myself, “The airline lost my bags and the place I'm supposed to stay at locked me out and told me not to come back. At least for tonight, my only choice is to sleep in the car. That's if i could sleep at all. -Sigh- I might as well find other arrangements while I’m still awake.”

  Reaching for my phone, I began to browse my options. Luckily, the first listing that came up on Roommates, does not look sketch at all. “Room for rent, utilities included, and it looks like a nicely sized house that they’re renting the room from” a light smile cracked on my face. “Alright, let me just send them an email. It’s 2 o’clock in the morning now, and I doubt anyone would be happy to answer a call.”

  Getting off a long flight, a few hours ago, fatigue and exhaustion is real; and I can feel every bit of it. I’d do anything for a nice hot shower right now. “Oh, wait! the gym!” the idea popped into my head, “I can use their facilities to freshen up. Luckily there’s one on the way to the rental.”

  As I put the car in gear, I head towards the gym, silently hoping this day won’t start snowballing into even worse territory; it’s barely started as it is. 3 o’clock in the morning and the streets resemble a deserted city, a stark contrast to the lively scenes back home that last until daybreak. Moving here will definitely be a good change in pace. I am overjoyed as I pull into the parking lot, cause any load off my back is better than nothing at this point. Since I’m here anyways, I also make use of the time, and have a quick workout.

  “Is this place even open?” I muttered, peering through the expansive glass door. The gym lights blazed, yet an eerie stillness pervaded the space, devoid of any souls. I decided to at least go in and take a look; as it seems the doors are unlocked and the sign does say OPEN. Stepping cautiously, my footsteps echoed in the deserted gym. The faint sound of snoring caught my attention as I approached the counter. To my surprise, a slumbering panda greeted me.

  “Hello?” I called out, but no response. I called out a few more times, and on the last the panda moved. With a sudden jolt, it reached for a tag and slammed it on the counter before resuming its snoring symphony. I take that as a “here’s your pass and git goin’,” so I grabbed the tag and left him alone.

  Walking in, I’m anticipating a zombie walking up on me at any moment, like those cringy horror comedies. There’s no point in joking around to make me feel any better. Luckily I always carry a spare set of compression gear in all my bags in case a spontaneous gym session pops; and I’m glad I did.

  After getting changed, I made my way to the main floor and prepared from some bench presses, and after that some more shoulder and back. I’m still pretty steamed from my recent breakup, so a few extra presses is cake. After all, the break up put me in this current mess to begin with. Was it my fault? Was I too close minded? Maybe if I gave his proposal a bit more time, maybe it would work out. After all, what’s one other person joining the relationship anyways. Maybe, like others might say, the more the merrier. I can’t even remember when was the last time we had an intimate moment, just him and I. There’s always another.

  Anyways, enough self loathing, my time is up, and I should make use of the facilities and relax a bit before heading out. Other than that one email I sent~ I haven’t looked for backups. But before that, I’d better rinse off before doing anything else, worked up quite a sweat and I can smell myself without even trying. Oh wait, I swear I smelled prey while I was distracted by my thoughts. but I don’t smell it anymore, I guess it was just my imagination. Even if it was, I wouldn’t be in the mood for it after the break up anyways… but maybe it could help me get over it. Aghh… this is beyond frustrating!

  After finishing up in the main workout area, I made my way back to the locker room, heading straight for the showers for a quick rinse. Expecting a jolt of icy water, I was surprised to feel only lukewarm streams cascading over me. This gym must either splurge on perpetual hot water for the showers or someone had recently used them. Perhaps I did smell prey earlier, though my senses detected no lingering scents beyond the subtle ambiance of the gym.

  "Relax," I murmured to myself, attempting to dismiss the creeping paranoia. "I should be accustomed to this by now; my now ex-partner pulls these spy missions all the time and I always know he was there because of his distinctive scent.” I reached for the faucet lever, with a slump, and turned off the water. I grabbed a towel to cover myself and I walked towards the sauna. Peering inside, my eyes locked onto a figure—a small, petite creature. The earlier scent that had briefly teased my senses—undoubtedly emanating from this new presence.

  [newpage][chapter:Stay]

  Well, I’m just here for the sauna, not a hookup, so let’s keep it the way it is. I opened the door and got in; he hadn't moved… not even a twitch. Determined to avoid any awkward interactions, my eyes fixed on the seat farthest away, nestled in the adjacent corner. My mind and body disconnected for a brief moment, and my body decided to sit at the corner closest adjacent to him.

  We both remained silent for what felt like hours. I have to admit, he is very good looking and he has a vibe that I can’t really describe. One that will definitely send my ex into a frenzy, if he saw us together. I can feel blood rushing to my face as the sight of him makes me blush.

  This is getting more and more awkward as this silence lingered. "What brings someone like you here at this time of day?" I said, hoping to break this heat resistant permafrost ice between us. His ears twitched, so perhaps he heard me. “Someone like me?” He replied. I choked on my own words, hearing his reply. It was blatantly obvious I was rude, and there was no excuse for it. Being small and petite, he came off very stern and authoritative form just those three words. "Sorry, but I couldn't help but notice you when I walked in," I replied, but his eyes remained shut. Embarrassed at my current predicament, I try to look away.

  My prying eyes could not resist the urge to look at him again, and I caved soon after. He was leaning back, relaxed, with a small towel around his waist. His slender and toned waist. No abs to show, but he is clearly not out of shape. A nice modest frame, not loudly show-tell like all the other so called gym-mates. While distracted by his physique, I suddenly realized my body was preparing for some woodwork. A log was erected upright under my own towel, and there was no stopping it. Embarrassingly, I scrambled to hide a tree with a small tarp; and it went as it could. Leaning forward while pushing the shaft down, which led me to sit in the most uncomfortable and awkward position. The silence from him is killing me. Surely he must be mad at my total disrespect to a complete stranger.

  Letting out a forced cough and clearing my throat, I tried to get his attention again. As I took a glance at him again, our eyes locked. Gazing into his eyes, my mouth took on a life of its own. “I’m sorry for what I said earlier,” I said to him with my most sincere apology. At this point I am lost in his delightful emerald green eyes. His eye contact broke, and came back to my senses, my body was fidgeting and squirming to find a comfortable position to sit. My senses were scrambled and my head was too. I swear he said something between all this, but it was drowned out.

  A muffled sound finally passed through and I heard him speaking. “… sit on something weird or what?” He said, even though I couldn’t hear him well from my mess, I knew what he was asking. “N-no, nothings wrong,” I replied. It grew silent again for a moment. I thought he saw my tree and decided to ignore me like a sane person would. However, his gaze stood still and he sat there motionless, like a deer in headlights. His cheeks grew red as he stared at, for what I thought was, me. Following his line of sight, I realized that my failed attempt to tie down a tree was what he was looking at.

  The scent of prey in fear of the predator is very distinct. However this was different. The smell of fear is not in the air. “My eyes are up here,” I said and the silence broke. His eyes widened, and as expected fear radiated from him. It was intoxicating and intensified by the steam of the sauna. His speech shakened and he replied “I-I didn’t mean to…” as he scanned the room for something to look at, away from me. “No worries,” I replied while a small tent caught my eyes, “it’s nice to know you liked what you saw.” His eyes got bigger and he looked shocked. He tilted his head forward, and seemed to realize what I was talking about. He began to scramble to hide his evidence. I could only admire how adorable he is as he struggled. I chuckled and said to him “I guess we both sat on something uncomfortable.”

  He struggled a bit more and then he seems to have given up. Leaning back onto his seat again, closed his eyes and crossed in arms. Again we sat in silence. Sparing him and I even more embarrassment, we came to a silent mutual agreement to forget what happened. Not long after, he stood up with his member firmly pointing forward while holding up the towel. “I'll have to take my leave now,” he said. My heart sank hearing those words. I’ll have to admit that I am infatuated with him. Every move and word that I make is like walking on eggshells and nails. The idea of him leaving after I made such a horrific impression feels like a stake being slowly driven into my chest. Do I confess? Should I say something? Anything? He is about to leave and I haven’t even asked for his name.

  "I’m extremely sorry," I said. The pure drive of instincts like a predator makes its move to secure its target, my mouth splurged the apology. I want him to stay, perhaps get to know him better. But the things I’ve said so far; I’ve only been stepping on branches. "To tell you the truth, I think you’re very cute," I confessed; my hand of cards folded and I laid my intentions bare.

  A confused look took over his face, yet still adorable. “Cute?” he questioned, his voice cracked at the end. Realizing my cards are all on the table for him to see, I can’t help but to look away and break eye contact. I am ashamed of myself to fold so quickly. Him and I both froze and it grew silent again. I grew worried as he stood there both speechless and motionless. A quick glance at him, and I saw his cheeks grow red but anger covered his face. Mustering up what manhood that is left in me, I asked him "A-are you ok? You're spacing out. You're not about to pass out, are you? Maybe we should get out of the steam before you get a heat stroke.” He didn’t respond and stayed as if he was like a statue. “what if he collapses while standing?” I thought, growing more and more worried. I stood up and stepped towards him, placing a hand on his shoulder; if he does fall it will be easier for me to catch his fall. As soon as my hand made contact, his body jerked the slightest, and he replied “Yeah, I’m fine.” His face, now cherry red. I’m not sure if it's because of the heat in the sauna that his face is so red, but I can’t shake off this inkling of feeling he feels the same way. His reassurance was much needed, I was worried beyond what was necessary. A sigh of relief escapes me and I lift my hands off his shoulder knowing he is away from danger. My hand did not travel far before I felt someone holding my wrist. His gentle hands gripped onto my wrist; at the very least, I might have done something right for once.

  “If you're not in a hurry to leave, I’d appreciate your company,” I asked as he stared into my eyes. He leaned forward without saying a word. Worst case scenarios run through my head as he leans closer, is he passing out? I attempt to position myself, ready to catch his fall if it does happen. It was not him that lost his footing, but me. I stumbled backwards onto the bench, and in my panic, I dragged him with me. He fell for all the wrong reasons. Not because he was passing out, and not because he tripped; he fell because I, of all people, dragged him down with me.

  As I landed on the bench, I felt him landing on me. He slid down, and found his footing on his knees. My towel fell off, as a result of the commotion. He grabbed my waist as we fell and the towel loosened. His face now rested on my pelvis and his chest held down my penis. I’m panicking, in part because I’m worried he is hurt, but also because he is pressed up on me. Coming out of his daze, he placed his hands on both of my inner thighs and pushed. He pushed with his body weight trying to get up. In doing so, my legs were pushed apart and as he pushed himself up, my excitement grazed his chin.

  I’m now in the worst position I could be in front of a stranger; legs spread and vulnerable. In a knee-jerk reaction, I sat up and leaned forward and things got even more embarrassing. As a consequence of my cock up high and stiff, when I sat up, it came down on his face like a sponge hammer. It landed on his face, and slid off to the side of his face and landed between his neck and shoulder. With gentle pressure, he tilted his head, and elevated his shoulder, pressing on my shaft. I felt him rubbing his cheek on my shaft and licks as his head moved closer to the base.

  Emotions in turmoil are warring inside my head. Nerves, embarrassment, and excitement are all one and the same at this point, indistinguishable from each other. His hands made a move, lifting from my thighs they moved to grip firmly on the base of my penis. He leaned back and my penis was no longer supported by the embrace of his cheek and shoulder. It is propped up at the pause by his hands. He brought his head forward, until his soft lips touched the tip, with a gentle kiss. At the end of the piss, he pulled his head back. Precum latched onto his lips, and a trail hung on to dear life as it formed a downward arching bridge, connecting from his lips to the tip of my penis. His gentle hands and lips excited my member even more, and precum continued to drool out. The bridge soon gave way and broke from the weight of the volume. He licked his lips and brought his head forward again.

  I am speechless. I am in shock. I am excited. I am nervous. There are so many emotions battling inside me. Should I stop this? Is this right? Did he agree to this? thoughts and questions flood my mind as I feel the tip my penis being snuggled in a wet and warm tube. Barely half of me is inside of his mouth on the first round. But after each advance and retreat, my penis slid down deeper into his mouth. The farther it went, the tighter the grip. A slow rhythmic dance, his insides pulsating, a firm grip followed by a soft release, my skin slides effortlessly like a smooth tango with the inside of his throat. I’m holding myself back with all my might; covering my mouth in fear that my moans will cause him discomfort. All I can do is breathe heavily, as I quickly feel my limits.

  Performance anxiety I fear most, not being able to fulfill the needs of others. It seems just as quickly he began to enjoy himself, I too am quickly at my limits. “No… this soon?” I thought to myself, “it hardly just started and I don’t know how much more of this I can take… he’s so tight…” I lost count of how many pumps he did, but if I can take a guess, it’s somewhere around three or four. It is even too short to be premature. I felt my control slipping as the next advance he made, I came a little, and with each pump I came a bit more in his throat. I can’t help it, I’m at my limits. I lost my control with his next pump. I felt my penis leave his tight throat for the last time, and my body went wild. My hands that were supporting me flew up, and grabbed his head. Just before I lost control and cum, my hands pulled his head towards me. Without the support of my arms, gravity forced me to lean back, and this gave this thrust a bit more force. My body tensed and my muscles locked, holding his head firm and securing it in place.

  My eyes open and I see him struggling, with me fully inside and his nose nestled on my knot. Suddenly I felt his throat pulsating and its grip grew tighter. Reality caught up to me and I realize this was undoubtedly a bad move on my part. Realizing I am practically force feeding him with a tube, I quickly let go of his head, and he sprung backwards with his throat still gripping firm. As soon as my cock left his mouth, it felt as if I had cum a second time. What was left and held back by being inside him was swiftly released upon exiting. Depositing the rest, on his face.

  Gasps and coughing ensued, as he caught his breath. I hunched over in my seat, and I tried my hardest to help him in any way I could. As soon as he caught his breath, “JERK!” he said, followed by more panting and coughing. I can't blame him for saying this. From the start till now, I’ve unintentionally acted like one. These eggshells I've been walking on feels like a shattered glass bridge now crumbling, and I’m falling into definite regret.

  My heart raced, saddened and in a panic. I caused him pain… physical, and I can surmise emotional as well. Just my luck, for ruining one relationship and killing one that didn’t even exist. The heartache was unbearable, anything he said after calling me a jerk sounded like jumbled up words that I just can’t understand. I want him to feel calm. I want. I want to make things right. An u seen force drove me to lean forward, to give him a hug and hope for a last change to make it right. But my hopes shattered as he pushed me away and I saw him run out of the room. I managed to get up halfway before my legs gave up on me and I fell to the ground like a limp sack of meat. “Move dammit!” I scolded myself, “why won’t my damn legs move!” Sitting on the floor of the sauna, all I could do was watch while the prey got away. Tears run down my face, as I’m internally shaming myself for what I did.

  Several minutes passed, and he had been long gone. I can finally move my legs again. I’m numb, my body can hardly feel anything. I dragged myself to have a shower before leaving. Still unable to get him out of my head. What I did is horrible… it’s not like me… so why… why him of all people? My ex- always complains I’m never down to do these sorts of things, but here I am. Pummeling what’s left of my pride and sanity, I bid farewell to the showers, and off to dry and change. It’s difficult pulling myself up after that disaster. On my way to my locker, I noticed a duffle bag that was not there before when I came in. Is that his? Did he run off and leave his things? I scramble to dry off and quickly change into what I can grab. As quickly as I could, I rushed to the entrance of the gym, hoping I’m not too late. At the very least I can let a stranger know he left his things.

  Arriving at the front, I was greeted by a very grumpy and mad panda. “You’re new here aren’t ya?” He said, his face frowned and a piercing stare, stared me down. “Y-yes, this is my first time. Did you happen to see…” “A small fella scared and running out of here? Why yes I did. If you want to bully someone, I’d like to see you try me instead,” The panda cut me off, and his threats were definitely warranted. “Look, wolves like your kind ain’t too welcomed here. Using the facility is one thing, but harassment will only get you a one way ticket out of here in cuffs.” “Y-yes sir…” I replied. I guess I missed him. I’m stupid to think he’d still be here after that. Like, what was I thinking? Was he gonna chat up a storm and pretend like nothing happened? Before going back and getting the rest of my things, I popped panda a quick question, “so, the lockers, can someone keep their things here?” “Yes, but I highly don’t recommend it. Your things will disappear or be thrown away if you do. The lockers are shared, once you're done, you return the key, and it goes to the next person” the panda explained. “Thanks,” I replied and went to grab the rest of my things. To get to the locker room, I have to make my way through the main room. I haven’t picked up any other scent. Just the panda in the front and his very distinct scent. It still lingers in the main room, and that duffle bag is most likely his. Well.. there’s only one way to find out.

  Arriving at my locker, directly behind the one he was using, I took my time changing into the proper attire. I have an interview after all. During this time, I debated on leaving his things with the panda? Or I should return it to him and make a proper apology. This might as well be the only chance I have to apologize. The key to his locker is still inserted. Looks like his gym gear is still in here and his sneakers. I opened his duffle bag and shoved everything in there, and then shoved his duffle bag into mine, like a Russian doll but duffle bags. After getting all my things, I make my leave. A quick stop at the front counter to return the keys, and I see the panda again.

  Returning the keys, I decided to make idle chit chat, to get to know this place a bit more. “Was he a regular here?” I asked the panda. “Who’d like to know? Sure as hell better not be you…” he replied, while staring daggers into me. “Uh, sadly yes, I would like to know. I think I said something that offended him, and I want to apologize personally.” His expression waned, and took a quick pause. “Well… yes, he is a regular here,” he replied. I promptly thanked him and took my leave from the establishment.

  Standing at the door of my car, my hand reached for the handle and stopped. My mind replaying the entire event over and over, scolding myself, and pointing out every wrong turn. A chilling breeze graced the back of my neck, and I snapped back into the moment. Opening the car door I flung my bag across, and onto the passenger seat. I didn’t get his name, and not even his number. I’m a fool who surrendered to his own lust. As I’m sitting in my car contemplating what to do next, his scent filled the car. It was suffocating, but I just can’t get enough. It hadn't been an hour since the load of cum. The scent drives me crazy.

  Arousal toyed with me, as I sat in my car with another raging boner. My knot is usually the last to show, but it’s already out and another load is urging to pop. I can’t think straight, my breath deepens and quickens , and my heart beats like drums. My left hand made its way down my pants and my right hand reached for the duffle bag. I stroke and rub, doing all I could to release the load. All it did was make me more and more sensitive, but the load wouldn’t release. My mind raged with frustration, and landed on a possible cause; His sent. His scent must be the reason. The first thing I pulled from his duffle bag was a sock… his sock. The next thing I pulled out was a pair of black compression underwear… his underwear. What I’m wearing is all that I have now, since my luggage is still nowhere to be found. To keep things clean I had to use his sock. I rolled his sock covering my cock like a condom to keep things clean, and smothered my face with his underwear as a last ditch effort to have this load pop. His sock was tight, and reminded me of what I felt inside him. A long last, one last load came, and freed me from the tension.

  Coming down from the high, my hand holding his garment rested in my chest, and his sock clung onto my hard cock, drenched in cum and slightly inflated by the contents. What have I become? I pride myself on being poised and composed. In the midst of orgies and being cucked, it was never difficult to remain unbiased and professional. But this… Him… Now I’m nothing more than a broken heart and crumbling pride.